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- NickVenturella.com 7-14-18 - Focus on the end light when in the tunnel
NickVenturella.com 7-14-18 - Focus on the end light when in the tunnel
Focus on the end light when in the tunnel
The fear of the unknown is not a state-of-mind in which I like to find myself.Perhaps you feel similarly?However, it happens.Life happens. We've discussed this before.The ever-changing chaos of life rolls on all around us every day. It can take the form of a family crisis, or loss of employment, a pet passing away, or even traveling to an unfamiliar place.These kinds of life events can cause a lot of anxiety, and until one can wrap their head around a plan to address the chaos, a strong sense of overwhelm can consume you.That's natural but if embraced the tendency is to want to give up and that's often the surest route to the least desired outcome.When you get overwhelmed that can paralyze you from taking the necessary action to move through, and eventually past, the chaos.I’ve said it before, but it's worth being repeated...Moving through the chaos, vs. trying to circumvent it, will eventually move you past it and allow you to learn and grow from the experience (aka - turning something negative into something positive).So, how do you move past the paralyzing overwhelm to take appropriate action to push through the chaos when you don’t even know where to start?You have to find hope. You have to find the glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel that you can focus on. Most chaos is temporary, though when in the middle of it, it feels like it will be eternal.Intellectually knowing chaos is temporary doesn't completely transform your emotional response to it, which is why focusing on something positive, having faith, having hope is crucial to sustain motivation toward working through the chaos. So, where to start?First, breathe. Close your eyes and concentrate on your breathing for a few minutes.Breathing can help you collect yourself enough to take another small step in a positive direction, or at the least, stop the bleeding (so to speak) for the moment. Here's a simple breathing exercise you can do.Next, make a list of what you’re anxious about – no matter how big, small, real or imagined it may seem. Visually see your anxiety written on a page.Then ask yourself, “what’s one thing I could control to improve my level of anxiety?” Strive to come up with at least 5 ideas and start taking action on one of them immediately. Second, write out what's actually going well in your life right now. For example, you may be in good physical health, you may have an emergency fund of cash-on-hand, you may have close friends or relatives you can connect with to simply talk about what’s going on.Then make daily effort to sustain your gratitude towards those things that are going well in your life. Re-read that list everyday if necessary. This helps remind you that not all is bad and it helps renew a sense of hope, which is needed to motivate you to push through the chaos.Next, make a list of people you know who will be supportive of you in your time of need and/or those who are possibly in a position to help you.Use that list daily to call/connect with at least one of them daily to catch up and see how they're doing. It's important to have a sense of belonging, a sense of community in a time of chaos, plus your family/friends/contacts may have leads on potential solutions to help your current situation. See if you can think of, and add, a few more people to that list each day -- think of past coworkers from previous jobs, former classmates, etc.As you keep focused on the light at the end of the tunnel and consistently take some of the critical actions listed above, pay attention to other situation solution ideas that will emerge over time, write those down and slowly but surely you will formulate a plan.Eventually you will emerge from the chaos, different, grown, more resilient. However, once you're through the chaos be sure to remember the humility of the chaos, have empathy for others' chaos and be kind.
Sincerely,Nick VenturellaNickVenturella.com