NickVenturella.com 12-07-18 - Humbled yet? Ego check.

Humbled yet? Ego check.

December 07, 2018

“…I ain’t down but I can’t get up yet…It’s a long ride back to the way I want to feel…”That’s the sentiment of the journey I've been on this year.That’s actually a lyric from a song by musician Roger Clyne’s previous band, The Refreshments. The song is called "Sin Nombre."I share that lyric because one of my main goals this year was to get back into gigging out as a musician and immersing myself more in my on- and off-line music community. That’s no easy feat with a working spouse, 2 young kids – one with special needs – as well as my own full-time and freelance work.The thought at the beginning of 2018 was that, I know from experience that when I’m more involved in music (the arts in general, really) it has a positive effect on my mindset and mood – it’s my authentic self, who I am, where I belong. I’m convinced it leads me to be more productive day-to-day, increases my mood and generally energizes me. It helps me have more creative ideas, and not just for music, but at work as well.Overall, being an active musician makes me a better person than when I’m not an active one.Have you found something in your life that has that effect on you? Hit reply and let me know.I feel good that I’ve accomplished the goal I set out to this year, which was to seriously work my way back into music and actively gig to the extent my time and availability would allow.For a while in the last few years, I was embarrassed to call myself a musician because I was just not able to be actively involved in music and the music community with which I was previously very involved. So, while setting up a single gig about once a month may not seem like much, this step was a great leap from where I’ve been.It wasn’t always like that. Prior to kids, as a solo artist, I would practice whenever I wanted and book gigs with far less scheduling conflicts than today – multiple shows per month. In fact, my wife and I would take fun road trips (mini getaways) to various cities or states where I was scheduled to perform and because I was “working” the gigs paid for our trips and then some.Life happens though. For me, I got side-tracked from being available to practice music as much as I’d like and gig out regularly as a result of serious family needs. I have no regrets about where my focus went then. The family I have now is the result of that effort and collaboration with my wife – something for which I’m truly grateful (it’s pretty much our greatest life achievement to date).If anything, the experience has humbled me and made me even more grateful for the level of availability I now have to be involved with my family and in music.When life humbles you, if you heed its lessons, there’s a “death to self” that can occur, which is really a death to our ego that removes much of the focus that we previously -- whether consciously or unconsciously -- put on ourselves. If this concept appeals to you at all, I highly recommend Anthony De Mello’s book, “The Way to Love.”When playing music, it becomes a flow state for me. It’s a very spiritual or transcendent experience, and while it may sound corny to you, it’s how I connect with God and He connects through me to others for whom my music and authentic self resonates. Now, you may not believe or agree with that last bit depending on your spiritual beliefs, but you can likely understand and relate to its sentiment.Now that my youngest is 3 years old, my wife and I are starting to see that we’re moving beyond the total “on-call” state of tending to baby/toddler needs, which is opening the door for availability in other areas – for me, that’s music and the ephemeral life ponderings that result (and often end up in this newsletter).The point is, to achieve being the best version of yourself in the moment and in the chapter of your life that you’re currently in, you simply have to be humble enough to do the work, even if that means taking baby steps toward the way you want to feel.Freeing your mind enough to be grateful for any opportunity to engage in your passions or activities that you know make you better, and being detached from too many expectations about what you’re engaged in and/or those around you, will help you feel contented in the current moment, in your current situation, and in whatever is to come next week or next year or in 10 years.

Have a great weekend!Sincerely,Nick VenturellaNickVenturella.com